The Downfall of Western Civilization

I understand that many people are cynical about Valentine’s Day. Frankly, I am as well. Why do I need a specific day to be peer-pressured into buying flowers/candy/jewelry for my significant other? To me, any day that ends in “y” is a perfect day to tell someone you love them. Even if you’re single.

A local Providence radio station, 94 HJY, took this cynicism to a whole new level with this year’s Valentine’s Day contest. Their morning personalities, Paul and Al, gave away a free divorce. Since I’m on their mailing list, I was notified about this via e-mail. At first, I thought it was spam. No one could be this cold, not even lawyers who advertise divorce on billboards. However, I cautiously followed their hyperlinks and found it to be legit. In partnership with a local law firm, they were offerring a free divorce. The only light I could see in this dark tunnel was one of their clauses: No one with children under 18. Well, at least they weren’t total bastards.

My wife and I were outraged. The divorce rate in this country is bad enough at 53%; it doesn’t need any encouragement. However, “contests” like these only serve as part of the problem, not the solution. I’m fully aware that marriage doesn’t always work. Sometimes, it is best for both parties to go their separate ways. When we’re manipulated, even encouraged, to end a committed relationship bound by God and law, that’s taking it a little too far.

Fortunately, other radio stations have a better idea. While Valentine’s Day has become mostly about women, 101.5 KGB has created the men’s version of Valentine’s Day: Steak-n-Knobber Day. Every year on March 15th, we men are entitled to just that, a steak-n-knobber. Thanks to their morning personalities, Dave, Shelly and Chainsaw, marriages all over Southern California are being saved. Paul and Al could definitely take a lesson.

I realize New England has a totally different mentality than SoCal. Still, no matter what the mentality, a marriage is a sacred vow that should be honored, no matter what. This is just one more reason why I prefer to be in San Diego.

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